Jun 8, 2008

A hello from Never,Never Land

A fortnight ago, I caught myself parting with this piece of worldly wisdom to a younger cousin of mine. He was slipping into crib mode, lamenting on how he was forced to take up a course in Information Technology by his father, whereas his own personal choice was to do something linked with life sciences. I told him:
"Its too early for you to crib over crushed dreams. If you look back after a couple of years, these very dreams would appear childish and silly. You would have higher and bigger dreams, that would make everyone happy, and seem more realistic, than dream-like. You would value your dad’s move as sensible. Life never gives you what you want. It only gives you what you need. ”
Circa . a few years back. All hell would have broken loose, had the same advice been bestowed upon a certain star-in-the-eyes individual. Really appreciate the kid for the patience with which he recieved it.

'So come with me, where dreams are born, and time is never planned. Just think of happy things, and your heart will fly on wings, forever,in Never Never Land’. - Peter Pan

7 comments:

Shrinath said...

and I thought I was the only one :)

EnGeetham aka "My Song!" said...

The Party is happy. You have been assimilated into the establishment, by toeing the party line !

musafir said...

This is so sad.

Why are dreams always thought of as stupid, unrealistic, impractical etc?

All that the kid needed was someone to sit with him, truly listen to him, play the devil, evaluate the pros and cons in his POV and let him find out for himself in real-world terms whether his dream was worth pursuing or not. That's what grown-ups are for. To nurture dreams and not pretend to be grown-up and dish out useless advice {sorry to say it, but your advice is really useless. "Life never gives you what you want" - what rot!}

The only worthwhile aspect of being an adult is that you can still be starry eyed but have enough worldly sense to be able to decide what dreams to pursue.

I'd like to say more but I'll just stop here.

This is so sad.

~SuCh~ said...

@shrinath :

:)

@G:
:)

@musafir:

The idea of the post was not to admonish dreams. It was to show how dreams change shape, sometimes taking entirely different forms.

" ...listen to him..."

Did all that.This wasnt the only advice I gave. Told him that he can still do something related to life sciences with IT.


"...Real world terms ?" Disappointments of shattered dreams will not get along with real world terms. Atleast not at that age.

What is in the blog, is a portion that I caught myself saying in the flow, something which I, a few years back would have vehemantly reacted to.

"Life never gives you what you want, ...."

You'll get there, someday. But, hope you dont. :)

"... still be starry eyed but have enough worldly sense to be able to decide what dreams to pursue."

Precisely my point.
From the post:"Your dreams will be less dream-like, ..."

Anonymous said...

"You'll get there, someday. But, hope you dont."

Thanks, but if I do get "there", it will be because I -- was lazy/ wasn't disciplined/ wasn't ready to sacrifice/ took it easy/ didn't try hard enough/ didn't plan things properly/ didn't execute properly etc. I won't sigh saying life didn't give me what I wanted.

You had an opportunity to drive home the point that no dream is too small, too childish; that having dreams is the first step, the first step of a 1000 mile long journey; that bringing dreams to fruition takes hard work, sometimes a lifetime of work; that dreams exist for their own sake.

But then you chose to say: "If you look back after a couple of years, these very dreams would appear childish and silly. You would have higher and bigger dreams, that would make everyone happy, and seem more realistic, than dream-like"

I'm sorry but I'll just have to disagree and leave it at that.

--Musafir

Anonymous said...

Life never gives you what you want --

Are u so sure that NEVER U'll get what u want?

I think Destiny is in one's own hands!!

Karthik said...

hehe !! I wud have to agree with Musafir in that the advice seemed pretty useless :))

What would i have done - Taken him to a good bar, bought him a couple of drinks (implicit - taken more than a couple myself) and start cribbing about my own problems !! This way he would stop and i get a chance to drink with a topic to discuss !! :))